Merry Christmas

Roma and I want to wish you a Merry Christmas and thank you for all the love and prayers that we have felt during this year.  It has been a tough year made easier by the love we have felt from you.  We have received so many blessings because of this trial.  You, through your goodness have shown the love of Christ through your actions.  You are truly ministering angels.  We hardly have a day go by without a token of love from our neighbors, family and friends.  Thank you.

The word has gone out that I have pneumonia.  We went to the Dr. Tuesday feeling like I had the flu.  The Dr. concurred and gave me some antibiotics in case it was bacterial. He listened to my chest and and couldn't hear anything. On the way home I developed  extreme pain under my rib cage.  I thought it was a gas bubble, but it wouldn't go away.  It subsided enough to sleep that night, but the pain came back Wednesday. We called the Dr. and the Dr. said Roma quit jumping on Paul's chest, joke. He actually said to come down for a chest X-ray. Sure enough, they discovered the signs of pneumonia. They put me on a 3 day dose of steroids and the two antibiotics. I will take a 7 day dose of one and a continuing dose of the other.  I already feel much better.  The pain has subsided and the weakness is getting slowly better. We had planned on going to St. George for Christmas. We decided we shouldn't go because of the danger of it getting worse.  So the only pain we feel now is not being able to watch the 5 grandkids open their presents. But Nate, Shelly and Owen have decided to spend Christmas night with us so we won't miss Owen opening his presents. So that will be good. Again, a very Merry Christmas to you and yours. We love you.

Last times

I have had an emotional year as we have visited our kids in Virginia, Washington State and as I have witnessed the seasons go by. I wonder when and if I will see the far away grandkids again and if I will see another Thanksgiving and Christmas. I expect I will but it weighs on me a little. My 15 1/2 grandkids are precious to me, as are the rest of my family.
When I have those thoughts I am reminded in no uncertain terms that life doesn't end here. There is a life after this. We will continue the same relationships we have here and even expand them. That gives me a lot of comfort. My family is my life. I could not bear to be without them and I don't have to. No matter if I live six months or twenty years I will continue to be able to nurture those relationships.
Upate: Friday I had a Doctors appointment. All is well. They are are in the process of weaning my off the steroids. I have one more week. The steroids have affected my body in all kinds of adverse ways and I will be glad to be rid of them. They do help with inflammation so they were a help after the surgeries, I hope once the drugs are out of my system and my body starts functioning I will be able to gain more strength and be able to become more active.
As always we appreciate your prayers and faith in our behalf. We have received so many blessings and they come through you. God Bless

Washington and some thoughts.

On the Oregon Coast near Tillimook

It was cold and wet and fun

Grandma's the best!

Lap time with Grandpa

Homework time. I need a little practice too!

I am a little jealous of David's Lego collection!

Jodi dipping chocolates. They were fantastic.

Roma trying her hand. They were fantastic too!

Two lost teeth in less than a week.

Chillin

The new home. It is beautiful!

Before Thanksgiving Dave and Jodi invited us to visit their home. David was heading out to a two month deployment so wanted us to visit their new home before he left. They live in Lacey, WA in a brand new home. The area is beautiful if not a little wet. We drove over to the Oregon coast a day where we saw tremendous scenery and the Tillimook Cheese factory. We also spent a day in Seattle visiting several venues. We appreciate the fact that our kid take such good care of us and are willing to put up with us.

I have expressed before how I am not a patient man. With brain cancer that is not a good thing to be. Nothing happens fast. For example I have been on Steroids since my first surgery and I can't get off of them quickly even though they devastate my body with lost muscle mass, weakness, bloating and a myriad of other symptoms. The doctor has been able to reduce the dose that I take, but you can't quit them cold turkey without suffering dire consequences. So I have to be patient. I have a doctors appointment this week so I hope the doctor will reduce again the dose or maybe eliminate it. One could only hope.

I say this not to complain. I have had too many blessings for that. I only mention it because it is another lesson I am learning. As we have patience with our lot in life (with our adversity) and continue to trust in the Lord he will continue to comfort us and grant us ever greater blessings. In the Book of Mormon there is a verse that captures the thought. It is in 2 Nephi v 20 "Wherefore, ye must press  forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men, Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life" I believe that. I know that. It has brought me comfort and peace. 

I am humbled.

Yesterday I received word through the RS email that an article had been written about my testimony (that I gave the first Sunday this month) in the Mormon Times by my good friend Kristine Frederickson. http://www.mormontimes.com/article/18373/A-man-who-is-thankful-for-cancer?s_cid=voices&utm_source=voices 
It is very kind and complementary to me. Kristine had said in such a beautiful way things I have been grasping at to put into words for months. Thank you Kris.
I am still thankful for cancer. I am a better parent, grandparent, husband than I was six months ago, and I am certainly more in tune with the Spirit. I know that my Redeemer lives. He has carried me. I have felt his touch both  literally and though the kind acts of prayer, love, and service rendered to my family. It is overwhelming. I know that the Savior died for my sins, but he also suffered my infirmities so he could succor my pain and grief. I testify that he has done that. He will do that for you. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen
PS. Read some of Kris' others articles. They are great!

Another Kind Act

My sister-in-law owns a quilting store. She has been looking for some ways to help Roma and I with our medical bills.  Several of her customers at her store know Roma and have questioned Amy as to how they can help.  So Amy (Roma's sister) has decided to hold a silent auction for the next 2 months auctioning off discontinued quilts and donated quilts.  If you are interested read the poster for further details.  There have been so many acts of kindness shown to us during this trial.  We so appreciate everyone's love and help.  

Clean MRI

Just a status update. I had an appointment with my oncologist yesterday and received good news. My first MRI since the second surgery looks to be clean. That is a relief given the speed the tumor grew back the first time. I am continuing chemotherapy five days out of each 28.  I appreciate all your love and prayers. Each one is felt. I feel wrapped in the arms of my Savior and I know that it is a result of the service you do for me, my family and the Lord.
Thank you, thank you!

Virginia Trip

 WWII  Memorial

 Viet Nam Memorial

 Eleanor Roma

Isaac at Soccer

 Happy Girl

 Three Generations

 Sunday Afternoon Walk with Isaac and Miles

Miles and Emily on the Mall

Roma and have spent the past week at Emily's home. They flew us out to visit. It has been a marvelous time. We were worried about how I would handle the trip but I handled the flights well and Emily and Roma made sure I got plenty of rest. I have felt better the past few days than I have since the second surgery. Hopefully I have turned a corner and will feel better in the long term. I hope so!

My fathers younger brother Leo died last week. I feel bad I wasn't there for the funeral but we were already committed to be in Virginia. That leaves only one of four (Uncle Chuck) left. I appreciate all they have done for me. I love you Uncle Chuck and I wish I could be there to support you, Florence, and all the rest of the family. I love each one of you.

The power of positive thinking

Since my second surgery we have had a whirlwind of activity. We have had a lot excitement and visitors around. I love my family and friends.
The last few weeks I slipped into something of a funk. The fact that I am taking so long to recover has discouraged me and I think I have made it harder on my family and especially my good wife.
I woke up yesterday with a new attitude. After reading my scriptures and saying my prayers I decided I have been blessed beyond any person I know. I have a family that loves me; friends that care for me; and especially the Lord who cares for me and comforts me.
So I have determined to be more positive. It has already worked. I feel better and I feel more energy. My wife and I have laughed more than in weeks. I feel the love of the Savior even more that in the past. Life is good.

Tears of JOY

It couldn't get any better than this.

Five wonderful children w/ five wonderful spouses and 15 1/2 grandchildren.

I have had a tough couple of weeks, mostly due to extreme fatigue I am feeling due to the two surgeries and radiation. I conjured up all kinds of scenarios where my cancer was growing again. Luckily I went to the doctor and he said it was normal and that I would eventually feel better. He even said I could begin to exercise. I lost a lot of muscle mass in my legs than I want to get back. 

Even though I have had a tough time I feel like I am blessed mightily. As I kneel in prayer with Roma each night I call to mind the many blessings we have received. They have been multiplied and multiplied again. We have felt the prayers of hundreds of people. We have felt the hugs, eaten the food, received the well wishes in cards and letters, experienced the service of people known and unknown who have blessed our lives.Thank you so much! Most of all we have felt the love the Savior who knows of our needs and has already suffered my sins and experienced our suffering. I love the Lord. I honor him. 

"Sweet is the Joy the Gospel Brings"  I cry tears of joy each night at the blessings we have received. 

A most excellent day! Thursdays Hero and Beyond

As we were waiting for our tour to begin former Coach Lavell Edwards showed up and spent about 15 minutes with us. He is one of my heros. We were able to take lots of pictures. What a day! I mostly spent the day holding back tears (mostly unsuccessful). 

David nominated me for the award so he had to interview. Serves him right.

Bronco was so kind. He spent lots of time with my family and I. When he noticed Noah he took the hat off his head and placed it on his. Noah was pretty proud.

Abe felt a little left out until he was able to try on Riley Jensen's helmet. 

The Team Cheer

The whole group

Bronco and the Boys

The trip over to the Academy. Riley paid at lot of attention to me. She is a sweetheart.

The beginning of the tour.

On the main campus

At the game. Notice the hat. Air Force was far ahead by this picture. The only disappointment was that it wasn't a closer game.

Thursday's Hero

When I was diagnosed with a brain tumor one of the things we planned for my bucket list was a trip to the Air Force Academy for the BYU/AF game. I graduated from the Academy in 1971 so I have ties. I am a big BYU fan but also an AF fan so I don't care who wins. My kids do! They are all BYU fans. That was before I was diagnosed with another tumor that would require a second surgery. The surgery way just 9 days before the game, but we already had tickets and reservations. We had to go. In talking to Dr. Gardener he was a little skeptical but he was willing to consider it. As it turned out I was able to leave the hospital one day early and Nathan had arranged a big van for us to travel to the Academy in where I could spread out and rest when I needed to. 

David, my son, was trying to arrange a field pass for us but wasn't able to. It was suggested that he apply for Thursday's hero. I was chosen. My kid sprang it on me about a half hour before I was supposed to be there. I was shocked but pleased.

We went to the football offices. They were so kind and attentive. While we were waiting for everyone to show up Lavell Edwards came walking in. He is one of my heroes. He spent about 20 minutes talking to me, and all my family. It was awesome!

Then we took a tour of the building including the dressing room, the coaches offices, and team meeting rooms. We ended up at the indoor practice facility where we watched the end of practice.

When they finished they brought me over. One of the players explained the program and gave a bunch of memorabilia and gifts for me and my family.  Another player had me sign the flag they carry on the field at beginning of games. The was a special moment given the names that were on that flag. Then they had me lead a team cheer and every player and most coaches shook me hand. It was a very emotional moment. After the handshake the players all went and signed a flag for me. 

Once the players were done Coach Mendenhall came up and spent a lot of time with my family. He was so kind to me and made me feel like the most important person on earth at the moment. 

AFA Fireside

Friday night we were invited to a fireside with the LDS cadets at the Air Force Academy chapel. Coach Mendenhall, his wife, and a player from the team spoke. The messages were very uplifting.There was good music by the cadet choir and a BYU lineman. It brought back many memories of my time at the Academy. I was group leader of the the LDS cadets while there. There were only 25 active cadets at the time. There are over 150 now. Impressive!

Tour

Jodi was able to arrange a tour of the campus. I spent four years there but my family never had seen the facilities close up. It brought back memories especially when I saw cadets doing disciplinary tours (marching back and forth because of breaking rules). I did a few tours for a slight disciplinary problem I had. My family sure enjoyed the tour. The campus looks just it did when I was there. 

Game

The whole family enjoyed the game, but me the most!  I wish it could have been a closer game.

The academy is a great place to go and enjoy a football experience.  Over all it was a perfect weekend. 

Update

The Best Wife in the World

I wanted to give a short update on my condition and thank all of you for your prayers and notes of encouragement. 

I got out of the hospital Monday morning, one day earlier than last time. I had a great team of surgeons, great nursing, and a great family who was with me every moment of the day or night. I am much more tired than the last time due the radiation and the chemotherapy I finished just before the second surgery, but I expect to feel better each day.  We don't have the pathology on the second tumor yet. I expect it tomorrow. I am just glad it has been removed. It has given me a new lease on life. 

I still think I am one of the most blessed persons in the world. Throughout this experience I have felt a lot of peace. No matter what happens I know there is a plan for me. I know my Savior has my back. I believe in eternal families. Life is good. 

It's Cougar Day!

This is Paul's son, David. This is my first, and most likely last, post for my dad's blog. Paul felt it would be a good idea to send out an update. In my dad's last post he spokes of a seizure that he had experienced. Well, that seizure was followed by another seizure a couple of days later. After a visit to the hospital and a cat scan, it was determined that a mass, most likely a tumor, had grown its way back into my dad's brain. He started having the shakes in his right arm and his speech started to deteriorate, both signs of an advancing tumor. After speaking with his fantastic doctors, Dr. Wallentine and Dr. Gardener, Paul decided surgery was the best option.

Yesterday morning at five my dad checked in to the hospital for his second major brain surgery in three months. I wasn't there for his first surgery, but I was amazed an how calm my parents were through the whole procedure. My dad was cracking jokes and looked as calm and rested as I'd seen him lately. Without going into too many details, my dad both gave and received multiple priesthood blessings in the days prior, and all of us felt a very calm and confident assurance that this wasn't my dad's time. That feeling carried us through the morning.

The surgery was a complete success. Dr. Gardener skillfully extracted all of the badness that he could from my dad's Brain. We worried that this second proceedure would affect his speech and his ability to use his right arm. We shouldn't have worried at all. Other then the usual after effects of brain surgery, he is doing great! His speech is just fine and he doesn't show any issues with his movement. We are truly blessed!

At the moment my dad is recovering nicely in the hospital where I'm sure he will stay for the next few days. Today is the opening Saturday for college football, which my dad loves. We're all set to watch the Cougars take on the Huskies this afternoon.

To close, my dad is doing great. The many prayers and fasting for my dad has had a profound effect. We continually are feeling the influences of them. My dad wants to thank everyone for the many acts of kindness. I'm sure in the next few days he'll feel up to posting his own thoughts.

Harvest of blessings.

Our garden isn't as prolific as Joe's but we try!

I have had an interesting couple of weeks since my radiation treatment finished. The medical people warned me that the next few weeks could be my toughest. They were right! I have been so tired. Thats where the blessings have come.

Mondays Roma and I have been mowing our lawn. I trim the lawn and Roma mows. She enjoys the exercise (she says). That day I had a tough day so I decided I wouldn't trim the front lawn. The back lawn needs it because there are so many curves and tight spots that it is hard to mow without trimming first. So  I began to trim the back while Roma started mowing the front. By the time  I finished the trimming Roma began to mow the back yard. I decided to blow the grass off the sidewalks and began to do that. That's when I noticed Dustin and Emily Brown sweeping the sidewalks and my good neighbor Stan Soper heading down with his trimmer to edge our front lawn. He was upset because he couldn't do more, but we had our hearts full of the love we have received from our wonderful neighbors. Things like this have blessed our lives again and again. We are so grateful.

Every evening that we can Roma and I go out for a short walk around the neighborhood. The walk is good for me.  Last night was no different. I had had a pretty good day but felt a little light headed. As we were headed home (in front of the Tuttle home for those of you who know where I live) I experienced my first seizure. It wasn't very bad, but I couldn't talk or walk. Roma went to three homes before she found Mike and Ann Tucker at home. By the time they reached me the seizure had pretty much passed and I was able to stand. Mike and Ann supported me the rest of the way home and made sure I got into the home and was acting okay. 

I have been taking anti-seizure medicine since my tumor was discovered, so the seizure really surprised us. Roma call our oncologist and he said that as long as the seizure was over I would probably be all right. He said just to take me to the emergency room if it happened again. That didn't make Roma feel very good so she called her sister Amy whose husband (Kerry) is an Orem Fireman. Amy called Kerry (he was on duty) and he got permission to bring the ambulance over and check me out. That made Roma feel better. Roma also called the Rogan Taylor to see if he could give me a blessing. He came over with Rich Hill and they gave me an extraordinary blessing. What they said is sacred to me and the Comforter testified to my soul that what was said was the mind and will of the Lord. I may have experienced a seizure, but the the spiritual blessings we received were worth more than the trial.

So adversity brings blessings if we watch for it. I am so grateful for neighbors who follow promptings to come help a neighbor unsolicited and two young people who bring such joy to our lives. I am grateful for people who drop what they are doing to give blessings and honor their priesthood so they are worthy to do. 

The Lord really does multiply our blessings if we will only let him and trust in him. 

Music to my ears-Roma's post

Hi family (and friends) This is my first entry on Paul's blog.  He has been after me to write something for awhile, so here goes!  As you know, he finished radiation therapy on Tues.  They warned us that we shouldn't expect any change in the way he feels (extreme fatigue) for quite a few weeks.  But I can see a difference already!  Thursday I was working in the kitchen, he was in the sewing room working on his 500 piece jigsaw puzzle and I heard him whistling!! It made my day!  Later on I heard him humming too!  That is a sign that he is feeling better, even if it is just psychological feeling better because he is finished with the radiation.  That's progress!  How proud I am of this wonderful, strong, steady husband of mine.  He keeps us all feeling better because of his optimistic attitude and great faith.  Things are well at the Peterson home.

Radiation Done. Now we wait.

Cooper and Grandpa

Good Buddies

The 4 Babies and their mom's. All born in 2009.

I have felt the need to post some comments for several days, but couldn't piece together in my mind what I wanted to say. Then Amy, my daughter, put me onto a video published on LDS.org. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7zwQ_7q-fU&feature=player_embedded   The video is about a man that lost most of his family to a drunk driving teenager. It is very powerful and it explains how he was able to overcome his grief and bitterness by turning to the Savior. 

I have several people in my extended family who have taken some hard knocks lately. Life has a way of throwing curves at you that you don't expect. I know that is part of the Lord's plan. He wants to see us work our way through those trials, but he doesn't leave us alone to wander through the wilderness. In the Book of Mormon in Alma 7: 12 it says "And he will take upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him their infirmities that his bowels may be filled  with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities." The problem is as a Christian people we sometimes don't believe Christ. We wallow in grief and pain, or sin and never realize Christ is waiting for us to submit ourselves to his healing influence. He wants us to trust in his redeeming love. It takes away our grief and pain and replaces it with peace. The problems still remain, but our capacity to overcome is realized. I have a deep and abiding belief of that. 

I finished my radiation this past Tuesday. If the doctor is right I should start feeling a little more energy in a couple of weeks. I am still very tired, but I can see the light at then end of the tunnel. I am scheduled for a MRI the end of September to see the status of my tumor. I am cautiously optimistic that everything will be good. As I have said before; I am an impatient man. I don't want to wait that long but the Lord is teaching me patience. 

By the way; I have the best wife in the world. She is with me through thick and thin. We share laughter and tears. Her's is the tough road. I hope that when I feel a little more strength I can return the favor in a small way. She is my life.

Friends, friends, friends

As I expressed in my most recent entry the radiation treatment I receive is causing me to be extremely tired. Surprisingly so to me. Sleep doesn't refresh me. My mind wakes up, but my body still feels like I just finished a couple marathons in a row. I am not complaining. I could be much worse.

Yesterday our ward had a neighborhood picnic. All day I was looking forward to going; being with some of the wonderful people who are our neighbors. I was afraid I couldn't stay long because of the fatigue I was feeling, but we had determined to go at least for a few minutes. I need not have worried. Going there energized me. Granted, I was still tired but I plopped my body in a chair, ate a good meal, and just soaked up the energy and love from the people around me. My body remained energized for the rest of the night. I so much appreciate my friends and neighbors. You are all in my thoughts. All through this trial I have felt the support of family, friends, neighbors, and a multitude of people I don't even know. Christ says when you are serving your fellow men you are serving Him. I testify that Roma and I feel the love of the Savior through the service we have received from our fellow men.

Why can't I sleep?

This is Shae. She is my second oldest Grand daughter. She is a sweetheart. She is my most honest grandchild. Whenever I get proud she lets me know where I stand. When I told her I was getting speech therapy she thought that was okay (I need it) and then told her mom that she didn't want to talk like Grandpa. (and I thought I was making such progress!)

It is 4:00 AM and I have been awake for almost 2 hours now. I can't figure it out. The radiation therapy is supposed to make me tired and it does. I go around each day barely able to be on my feet for minutes at a time, but almost every night my mind awakes at 4 or so and I can't go back to sleep. I am not complaining. This is still a quiet time and I spend my time reflecting on my circumstances and blessings.

I am still am impatient man and I have a hard time submitting myself to the Lord's will. I have been told that my brain cancer will eventually kill me, but that is not good enough. I want to know when that is. It is driving me nuts to not be in control and yet it is humbling me. I find myself more and more turning to the Lord for comfort and peace and He gives it to me. In our family prayers Roma and I have been inspired to pray not for blessings for us, but to thank the Lord for blessings already received or promised and for blessings for other people. When we do that the Lord showers us with peace and further multiplies our blessings.

We need to believe Christ. Believe that through his atonement we all receive the gift of the resurrection and if we endure to the end eternal life with our families and ourFather in Heaven. I do believe that.

Enough preaching. I have only 4 radiation sessions left counting today. Next Tuesday I will graduate from radiology. I get a month off chemo and when I start back up it will only be for 5 days a month. It will take me a few weeks to regain my strength back but I will at least be on the upswing. My family has a few fun things to do this fall so I am looking forward to those events already. Life is good! I mean that!!

So Tired and Blessed

This has been an interesting week. The doctors and nurses keep warning about how tired I will be as the radiation continues. I have been tired, but have been able to muddle through. But this week I have really found out what they mean. I become exhausted mentally almost immediately after beginning a project. When I endeavor to help Roma around the house I have to quit and take a rest for awhile before even getting started. It isn't very fun, but on the other hand I feel quite blessed. I'm not sick. My general health remains good. My blood counts are excellent. I am tolerating the chemo and radiation just like the doctors hoped. I have the love of my family and friends; and I only have nine radiation sessions left. The doctor says the effects of the radiation will still keep compounding for a week or two after they stop radiating, but I can see the end of the tunnel.

Monday they change my treatment slightly. I go in early and they will take some new x-rays to reposition the machine so that they can spend the last seven treatments focusing on the area right around the original tumor. Once that is done I get a month off from chemo and radiation. After about six weeks they will do another MRI to determine my status. If everything is good I will then go on a maintenance dose of chemo 5 days a month. I can handle that!

My family has lots of plans for me this fall. I think they must like me. Whenever I get out of the house I am constantly reminded of how much love I feel from my neighbors and friends. I am truly blessed.

Zion Narrows

A couple of months ago Aaron, our son-in-law made reservations for a hike down Zion Narrows over the state Pioneer Day holiday. I made arrangements to get the time off as Zion National Park is one of my very favorite places to go. Then the brain tumor hit. The family still went, but instead of me going I am helping Roma babysit a few of the grandkids. I love my grandkids and I am having a blast being with them but I have to admit there have been some tears shed when I think about being in the narrows. If you haven't been, you should go. It is that spectacular and beautiful. Oh well, life seems to throw some snowballs at you when you're expecting daisies but hopefully we grow from our trials. I know I have!!

When I think back on this time since the tumor appeared the most constant theme that comes to mind is love. The love of immediate family that makes special arrangements to be with me or call Roma and I every day to check on us. The love of a neighborhood that still is bringing by food, cards, gifts, and good will to our home. The love of church leaders who just care and give of their time and means to serve my family and the rest of the Ward. The love of brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, cousins and old friends who care and share tears of sorrow, remembrance, and joy. Especially I think of the love of a Heavenly Father and His Son, Jesus Christ who loved us enough to prepare a plan whereby we could return to them. Life doesn't end here, Our relationships don't end here; they will continue for eternity. I know Roma and I will be all right because ours is an eternal relationship. I constantly marvel at the peace the Gospel of Jesus Christ brings to my heart. I am grateful for it and I hope you all can feel it in your hearts also.

Enduring

I had the best day yesterday (Saturday). I didn't have to go to radiation; I had a good nights sleep and had good energy all day. I even got to go to my Grandson Owen's first birthday party then after I got home watched a Harry Potter movie with Abe and Dallin. I wish every day were like that, but I realize they won't be like that all the time. My life now revolves around my treatment schedule. I have had 14 radiation treatments. Monday I will be half way done. I still haven't lost much hair although I shave it everyday (it makes it easier to apply lotion or other treatments to my tender head). I will lose it permanently everywhere the radiation enters and exits my head so I will have a splotchy head. Get used to a shaved Paul. Roma is even getting used to the look although she started crying last night when looking a pre-surgery picture of me.

I am rambling so I will get to what I am thinking about this morning. I am not a very patient person. I want to know the end from the beginning with time frames. I want to know if I will be here for the completion of the Harry Potter movies or the release of the Hobbit on film. (Both unimportant events) I want to know if BYU stays in the MWC or gets invited to the Big 12. I want to know if I will be around for my next grandchild's birth or the baptism of the 2 grandkids who will turn 8 next year. I want to know lots of things and I don't. I can't even know if my treatments are working for a month after they are finished. I think that is part of the Lord's plan. He wants to know if we are in the game until the end no matter when that is. As a people we want to know when things are going to happen. It is human nature but God operates on his eternal time frame. He has a plan for us and oftentimes it isn't for us to know. This life is a time to prove to him that we are in it for the long haul. I believe I am and I am confident God will let me stay long enough to complete what he wants me to accomplish while here. I just hope and pray I can endure to the end; to fight the good fight; to prove to my Heavenly Father that I am worthy to return to him when this life ends.

Baptism

Riley, my oldest grandchild. 12 years old. I am too young to have a grandkid that old.

My four newest grandchildren all born in 2009

Owen John, He like Grandma better than me.

Molly and Tyson, they like Grandpa, My goal is to convert Owen.

Noah and two of his cousin at his baptism. (Abe and Dallin)

The Birthday Boy and His Grandpa Pete

Cooper Joseph looks and acts like his dad. Which isn't all bad!

Roma makes each of the grandkids a quilt when they turn 8. This is Noah's

Saturday it was my privilege to attend the baptism of my Grandson Noah Thomas. He is a very good boy and a great big brother to his two younger brothers (Cooper and Tyson).

His dad baptized him, but Noah asked me to confirm him. This was two weeks ago when I was speaking even slower than I am now. I accepted his invitation. How could I not. The baptism went off great. When it was my turn to confirm him I felt the spirit so strong. I also felt the strength and the prayers of those in the circle with me. I am so appreciative of the power of the Spirit and the power of the priesthood. It guided me in giving that blessing and it's guiding me through my challenges. I love my family and occasions like this one strengthen that bond.